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I am horrible...
4 posters
I am horrible...
Where is the stair case to hell? (I am not racist)
A little girl walks into the bathroom
while her father is in the shower, she see's him completely naked and
shouts "Daddy daddy whats that?" her father replies "Thats
my penis sweetie" the girl asks "Daddy daddy when will I
get one of those between my legs?" he replies "When your
mother goes to bed!"
Q: What do you tell a girl with two
black eyes?
A: nothing, you already told her twice
A little boy ran up the stairs into his
parent's room yelling, "Daddy, Daddy, Daddy! Guess how old I am
today!" The father says, "Well, I don't know son ... how
old are you?" "I'M SEEEEEEEEVEEN!" "That's great
son, now go tell your Grampa." He runs down the stairs, "Grampa,
Grampa, Grampa! Guess how old I am today!" The grandfather looks
up from his paper. "Hmm, let Grampa take a look." The
grandfather reaches down the front of the boy's pants and under his
underwear. His hard old hand scrapes over the boy's penis. He rolls
each of the boy's testicles between his thumb and index finger. He
pushes further and sticks his middle finger nail deep into the boys
anus. He flexes his hand. As he pulls his hand out of the boy's pants
he pinches the tip of the boys penis to the point where the boy cries
"Ow!" The grandfather says, "You're seven." The
boy, "Yeah Grampa, how could you tell?" The grandfather
said, "I heard you tell your father."
My daughter has gotten to the age where she asks me embarrassing questions about sex. Just this morning she asked me "Is that the best you can do?"
A pregnant woman was at the hospital giving birth to her baby. The
delivery was almost complete, and at long last, the doctor held up
the newborn, cut the umbilical cord, and took a moment to look the
baby over. Then without missing a beat, the doctor threw the child
against a nearby wall with all of his might. The mother watched in
shock as the baby slid to the floor with a sickening thud.
The nurses and orderlies stood-by aghast as the doctor proceeded
to dribble the newborn around the room like a soccer ball before
finally passing the baby through the door into the hall with a mighty
kick. Everyone, including the fatigued mother, chased the doctor into
the hall just in time to see him scoop up the infant and run down the
corridor, stopping just long enough to bodycheck the child into the
wall every so often.
At the end of the hall, the doctor gave a mighty leap and
slam-dunked the baby into a nearby trashcan, giving himself a load
roar of approval. Finally the now quite large awe-struck crowd caught
up with the doctor. The mother was distraught and burst into tears.
"Why? Why in the name of God did you do that to my baby?"
she cried.
The doctor replied, "Just kidding! It was already dead!”
what's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
the wheelchair.
What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.
Actually, only 8 out of 10 people enjoy it, her dad is starting to
regret it.
What did the 4 year-old black kid ask his father for Christmas?
A yo-yo.
...
Nah, I'm just kidding--he has no idea who is father is.
How do you know your sister is on her period?
Your dad's dick tastes like blood.
Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout?
One comes back from camp.
A little girl walks into the bathroom
while her father is in the shower, she see's him completely naked and
shouts "Daddy daddy whats that?" her father replies "Thats
my penis sweetie" the girl asks "Daddy daddy when will I
get one of those between my legs?" he replies "When your
mother goes to bed!"
Q: What do you tell a girl with two
black eyes?
A: nothing, you already told her twice
A little boy ran up the stairs into his
parent's room yelling, "Daddy, Daddy, Daddy! Guess how old I am
today!" The father says, "Well, I don't know son ... how
old are you?" "I'M SEEEEEEEEVEEN!" "That's great
son, now go tell your Grampa." He runs down the stairs, "Grampa,
Grampa, Grampa! Guess how old I am today!" The grandfather looks
up from his paper. "Hmm, let Grampa take a look." The
grandfather reaches down the front of the boy's pants and under his
underwear. His hard old hand scrapes over the boy's penis. He rolls
each of the boy's testicles between his thumb and index finger. He
pushes further and sticks his middle finger nail deep into the boys
anus. He flexes his hand. As he pulls his hand out of the boy's pants
he pinches the tip of the boys penis to the point where the boy cries
"Ow!" The grandfather says, "You're seven." The
boy, "Yeah Grampa, how could you tell?" The grandfather
said, "I heard you tell your father."
My daughter has gotten to the age where she asks me embarrassing questions about sex. Just this morning she asked me "Is that the best you can do?"
A pregnant woman was at the hospital giving birth to her baby. The
delivery was almost complete, and at long last, the doctor held up
the newborn, cut the umbilical cord, and took a moment to look the
baby over. Then without missing a beat, the doctor threw the child
against a nearby wall with all of his might. The mother watched in
shock as the baby slid to the floor with a sickening thud.
The nurses and orderlies stood-by aghast as the doctor proceeded
to dribble the newborn around the room like a soccer ball before
finally passing the baby through the door into the hall with a mighty
kick. Everyone, including the fatigued mother, chased the doctor into
the hall just in time to see him scoop up the infant and run down the
corridor, stopping just long enough to bodycheck the child into the
wall every so often.
At the end of the hall, the doctor gave a mighty leap and
slam-dunked the baby into a nearby trashcan, giving himself a load
roar of approval. Finally the now quite large awe-struck crowd caught
up with the doctor. The mother was distraught and burst into tears.
"Why? Why in the name of God did you do that to my baby?"
she cried.
The doctor replied, "Just kidding! It was already dead!”
what's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
the wheelchair.
What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.
Actually, only 8 out of 10 people enjoy it, her dad is starting to
regret it.
What did the 4 year-old black kid ask his father for Christmas?
A yo-yo.
...
Nah, I'm just kidding--he has no idea who is father is.
How do you know your sister is on her period?
Your dad's dick tastes like blood.
Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout?
One comes back from camp.
hamaham- Member
- Posts : 540
Points : 17968
Reputation : -4
Join date : 2012-05-15
Location : Sweden
Re: I am horrible...
wow I cannot believe I laughed at some of these...
shock132- Member
- Posts : 290
Points : 17855
Reputation : 9
Join date : 2012-03-30
Age : 28
Location : Claysburg, PA
Re: I am horrible...
fail jokes!
112233qq- Member
- Posts : 155
Points : 17558
Reputation : -3
Join date : 2012-05-28
Age : 28
Location : Florida
Re: I am horrible...
112233qq wrote:fail jokes!
COME UP WITH BETTER THEN!!!!!!!!!!
hamaham- Member
- Posts : 540
Points : 17968
Reputation : -4
Join date : 2012-05-15
Location : Sweden
Re: I am horrible...
shock132 wrote:wow I cannot believe I laughed at some of these...
You are evil...
hamaham- Member
- Posts : 540
Points : 17968
Reputation : -4
Join date : 2012-05-15
Location : Sweden
Re: I am horrible...
hamaham wrote:Where is the stair case to hell? (I am not racist)
Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout?
One comes back from camp.
AWSOME i laughed damn hard at this one hahahaha XXDDD (no racist either)
im sorry if u think so
Ezomic- Admin
- Posts : 345
Points : 17981
Reputation : 25
Join date : 2012-03-21
Age : 28
Location : The Netherlands
Re: I am horrible...
Ezomic wrote:hamaham wrote:Where is the stair case to hell? (I am not racist)
Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout?
One comes back from camp.
AWSOME i laughed damn hard at this one hahahaha XXDDD (no racist either)
im sorry if u think so
lol I laughed so hard that i stopped searching! (not racist)
hamaham- Member
- Posts : 540
Points : 17968
Reputation : -4
Join date : 2012-05-15
Location : Sweden
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